We salespeople have to bite our tongue constantly.
Customers, sales managers, gate keepers are constantly testing our limits but of course it’s worth keeping out mouths shut when we receive those commission payments.
Here are 34 sarcastic things you will never hear a salesperson say –
I’m so glad that you’ve changed the commission structure
Yes I’d love to be put on hold
I enjoy customers telling me stats about my own product
I can’t wait to input data into the CRM
‘The challenger Sale’ completely changed the way I lived my life
The presentation app we use works great, every single time
I love wearing suits every, single, day
My customers know more about my products pricing than I do
I’m looking forward to our national sales meeting
We’re finally no longer using spreadsheets!
The prospect only took one call to close
Social selling isn’t complete nonsense
My sales manager is a legend
Not the decision maker? Let’s carry on chatting
It’s more productive to listen to the radio than is it to tune into the Salesman Podcast
Yes I know what “adding value” means…
Our CRM is so easy to use
They emailed back once, the deal is as good as done
Of course, I’ll just take that ridiculous discount you want and take it out of my commissions
Why don’t you ask your assistant to call my assistant
I frigging love cold calling
Cold calling is soooo effective
Sure you can have that discount you demanded… we’d be happy to go out of business to increase your profits marginally
I think I’ll have this weekend off
You don’t have the budget? Not to worry!
I love every single on of my customers
Grant Cardone doesn’t have a huge head
It makes me smile so much when my customers add me on Facebook
You’re right! When you shop online you will also get the service that I personally provide…
Our senior management really understand our needs and wants as salespeople
I love long meetings
I get so upset when a customer changes providers…
When a customer tells me how long they’ve been a customer, I smile inside
I can’t wait to get out of here and sit in traffic
What are a couple of sarcastic things that you’d never say?
Leave a comment with them below –